Testaments to the Boom Times to Come

[Testaments to the Boom Times to Come]

VIKINGS RECAP: S3E10

Previously on Vikings: Ragnar goes full Orpheus and declares he will follow Athelstan into the dark. It is somewhat ironic.

This week on Vikings: What will HAPPEN in THIS, the season FINALE of THE VIKINGS SHOW? Let’s find out!

Season 3, Episode 10: “The Dead”

Camp Viking. The French roll up with the treasure they are exchanging for the Vikings’ pinkie swear that they will take it and leave them alone. Ha ha ha, sure.

Also:

this is mostly a joke for my roommate (hi Cate)

Rollo goes off to tell Ragnar the treasure’s here, while the rest of the Vikings mosh around the chests and cheer and throw gold coins around and generally have a good time. Remember in S1 when the Vikings came back from Lindisfarne with all their loot, but then the Earl said they could only keep one thing each, and Ragnar was like “Maybe I will take this bowl and wear it as a cunning hat. No actually tho I will take this cute monk I mean this priest here.” Of course you remember. Ragnar also remembers, when he’s not too busy sweating and trembling and coughing in his tent.

Rollo: oh, bro :(

Ragnar: “I am dying. But at least I know that I will see Athelstan again.”

MAN do I love that all of Ragnar’s dialogue lately sounds like my paraphrasing. Dude’s at death’s door, he’s got no time to mess around with subtext, #txt it

[Testaments to the Boom Times to Come]

VIKINGS RECAP: S3E9

Previously on Vikings: the Iliad

Season 3, Episode 9: “Point Break”

Soooo, I feel like peeing blood isn’t exactly a great state to be in, physically. Bad news for Ragnar: he is the governor of that state. He walks gingerly over to Floki’s ropes course.

ooooo Floki what are your back tattoos?

Floki: “I do not understand why we failed, Ragnar. I did everything to make sure we would succeed.”
Ragnar: *GRUMBLESIIIIGGGHHH*

I THINK HE WISHES YOU HADN’T, FLOKES.

Ragnar walks off again. Good talk, guys.

Helga is lurking in the woods, and also walks off. I will mention what Helga is doing any time she is on screen, just fyi.

[Testaments to the Boom Times to Come]

VIKINGS RECAP: S3E8

Previously on Vikings: Athelstan was still dead.

Season 3, Episode 8: “To The Gates!” [exclamation point theirs] [seriously]

Despite being last seen yelling “AXE TIME” at Paris at night, Floki has not actually left his position atop some sort of scaffold outlook gazing over his floating siege towers, nor has he stopped doing a stationary interpretive dance at them.

Meanwhile, Ragnar is fretting. This is his face:

are you chewing your lip

Elsewhere in Camp Viking, everyone’s gettin’ ready. Vikings and Shieldmaidens grab axes and buckets and their MOXY, and everyone hauls butt to the boats. Ragnar holds Athelstan’s cross in his slightly shaking hands. YO VIKINGS, a more engaging scene: Ragnar holds Athelstan’s shoulders in his slightly shaking hands. “Are you ready, my friend?” Athelstan’s like: *close-up*

Extended prep sequence. Ropes, boats. We learn that Helga is in charge of quivers / my quivering heart. Shirtless Rollo and a dude wearing a wolf head on his head holler and smash things. Ragnar is judgy. This is his face:

what is with Ragnar “Reaction GIF” Lothbrok this episode