Testaments to the Boom Times to Come (Posts tagged Star Trek Voyager)

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
ryannorth
quasi-normalcy

‘Star Trek: Voyager’ Gothic

  • You’ve been on this tiny ship in the Delta Quadrant beyond any hope of recrew or resupply for over a year, but you keep seeing ensigns you don’t recognise. Everyone tells you that they’ve always been here
  • You go down to Engineering looking for Lt. Carey. B'elanna tells you that he’s just stepped out. He’s been ‘just stepped out’ for days.
  • A shuttle crashes on a desert planet. You speak with Chakotay about the possibility of trading for some new shuttles, but he looks at you funny and says “but we already have a full compliment of shuttles”
  • You run to the shuttlebay and inspect them personally. There is a full compliment of shuttles. And none of them even have a scratch.
  • The next week, a shuttle is torn to pieces in a plasma storm. You’re not even surprised when you find intact it in the shuttlebay an hour later.
  • You stop mentioning shuttles.
  • The ship has an encounter with some Kazon, but manages to get away. Their ships are primitive and slow and you shouldn’t run into them again.
  • Two weeks later, you meet the same Kazon, now somehow in front of you. You begin to suspect that you’re driving in circles
  • You go to Engineering looking for Lt. Carey. You haven’t seen him in two years. He’s ‘not there right now, but should be back in a minute’.
  • Janeway and Paris travel at warp 10 and turn into salamanders. You’re *sure* that it happened. You *remember* it happening! But no one brings it up. When you ask Tom about it, he doesn’t even register the question.
  • You scream “BUT YOU WERE A SALAMANDER!” into his ear. He doesn’t even hear you.
  • You see another Ensign you don’t recognise. You finslly just ask the computer for the crew compliment of Voyager. You are told that the answer is: 121.
  • A month later, the Hirogen conquer the ship, spend weeks brainwashing and surgically altering the crew into believing that they are actually characters in holographic simulations, and then hunt them for sport. This culminates in a pitched battle between the crew and the Hirogen in which the ship is utterly wrecked and dozens of people are killed.
  • Afterwards, you ask the computer for the ship’s crew compliment. You are told that the answer is: 147
  • The next day, you wake up and find Voyager restored to its original state.
  • You make a discreet inquiry about Lt. Carey. Now everyone acts like he’s dead but can’t tell you precisely when or how.
  • The Captain takes you aside one day and specifically instructs you not to mention Ensign Jetal to the Doctor. She says that she knows that this will be difficult, given how close we all were to her (and you in particular), but that for the greater good of the crew, you need to act like Ensign Jetal never existed. You solemnly nod your head and consent, and she gives you a comradely pat on the shoulder and leaves the room.
  • You have absolutely no idea who Ensign Jetal is.
  • Voyager absorbs the remaining crew of the USS Equinox. Well at least you’ll finally have an explanation for the new crew you see around the ship! You never see any of them ever again.
  • You’ve now travelled almost 40,000 light years towards home. You check the star charts; somehow, you’re still in the Delta Quadrant. You begin to wonder if the Beta Quadrant even exists.
  • The Delta Flyer is destroyed by Borg torpedos. You don’t even bother to check the shuttlebay for it, you just instinctively know that it will be back
  • A few months later, the Captain gives you the sad news: Lt. Carey is dead.
  • You finally make it back to the Alpha Quadrant, say your tearful farewells, and receive a handshake and a promotion from Admiral Paris. As one last thought before leaving Voyager forever, you pay a visit to the shuttlebay. You find it utterly empty, except for one lowly crewman with a mop and pail, swabbing the deck. “I…guess that Starfleet must have already cleared out the remaining shuttles?” You say uncertainly, your voice echoing in the cavernous, empty room. The crewman breaks off his mopping and looks at you like you’ve lost your mind and says: “Voyager never had any shuttles.”
startrekships

This is amazing

Star Trek Voyager Star Trek

platoapproved replied to your post “inexplicable-void replied to your post “What’s a popular/critically…”

sorry about the Xanax discoveries. i gotta say i didn’t grow up with TNG and i enjoy it a fair amount myself, but, like, you’re definitely not wrong. this isn’t a salty take so much as an entirely fair one.

I have this suspicion that even if TNG had always on in the background of my childhood, it still might not trigger the nostalgia home-comfort fondness for me, because what’s wild is that I DO get that off Voyager, and I had never seen Voyager either! But that’s the feeling I imagine people who came to love TNG later have, and I can absolutely understand it.

replies platoapproved Star Trek Star Trek TNG Star Trek Voyager Xanax :(

sherlocks-freebitch replied to your post: strangeassortment replied to your post: Not to…

Did you ever see the voyager episode where Janeway’s sonic shower malfunctioned and she was standing there with her fingers in her ears while her shower went off like a steam whistle?

Haaaaahahahaha, no but now I want to

replies sherlocks-freebitch Tarra Treks Tarra watches Voyager Tarra should watch this Voyager... Star Trek Voyager Star Trek
platoapproved

star trek captains ranked according to cooking ability

  • Sisko: grew up working in a restaurant. 11/10. the absolute best. makes non-replicated meals for his family and senior staff in the tradition passed down by his father. delicious. blessed. an emissary of flavor.
  • Kirk: can grill anything and has a mean pastry game. 9.5/10. definitely the guy you want on a camping trip, and would win any episode of chopped based on how he dealt with the gorn. if you take care of the judges with a makeshift cannon then there's no judges to say that you lose.
  • Picard: probably knows some French classics, but is decidedly rusty. 6/10. likes tea and wine more than food. makes a mean cucumber sandwich tho.
  • Archer: spent more time making models than learning how to cook. 3.5/10. his food is edible, but there's a reason they hired a chef to cater diplomatic dinners. has to consciously remind himself not to lick his lips whenever Trip mentions fried catfish.
  • Janeway: burned something with a replicator, which was not malfunctioning at the time. -8472/10. just eat her peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. it's safer.
WONDERFUL an emissary of flavor - accurate Kirk would win Chopped - ALSO ACCURATE former producer confirmed likes tea and wine more than food omG Janewaaayyyy babe never change Star Trek Star Trek DS9 Star Trek TOS Star Trek TNG Star Trek Voyager and that other one FOOD

Anonymous asked:

Hey I know you are just finishing DS9 but I was wondering if you had any interest in watching Voyager?? I think you would really like it plus I would love to read those recaps too :D

Good news bud! If you were to go far enough back in tag-time, you would find that Tarra Treks actually began with The Original Series, and covered TOS, The Next Generation, Voyager, and even Enterprise before settling in with Deep Space Nine!

For the guiding principles of Tarra Treks/origin story of how this even started, it was pretty much like this.

Anyhow, the easiest way to find all my Voyager content is probably just with my Tarra watches Voyager tag :)

replies anon Tarra Treks Tarra watches Voyager Star Trek Voyager Star Trek