Oscahs
THIS LIST COULD HAVE BEEN A LOT WORSE. I’m feeling nearly as good as could be expected!
I mean look, this year is very simple:
The Best Actor, Supporting Actor and Actress, Supporting Actress sets are obviously the kid/parent pairs of Timothée Chalamet & Michael Stuhlbarg and Saoirse Ronan & Laurie Metcalf. It’s just kismet that it works out so adorable and Right like this, but it does. The Academy left my Stuhlbarg out in the cold though, so there’s some pain. (I won’t kill it though, I promise Movie-Dad.)
The Best Adapted and Original Screenplays are for the same movies, respectively.
Editing goes to the Clockwork Person’s film, naturally, and Cinematography finally finally lands with Roger Deakins, who has earned this 10 times over.
The best costuming was in Lady Bird but the Best COSTUMES were for Phantom Thread, I mean holy god.
Best Production Design unquestionably underwater midcentury fantasy Baltimore, and we’re renaming it Achievements In Green. Best Original Score to the same picture—my most listened to soundtrack this year. (Shoutout to Greenwood though, he could take it and I’d be thrilled.)
You can give Best Hair & Makeup to the people who made Gary Oldman look like Winston Churchill that’s fine.
The only Sound Editing that matters this year is Vicky Krieps buttering toast, so that’s a drastic oversight. Sound Mixing… y’know it may have been a script choice, but that one moment in The Last Jedi, you know the one I’m talking about— a kid in my screening went “Ohh!” with the most wonder in her voice.
Best Original Song has given me life you have no idea. I mean yeah, arguably the best song was actually the one literally playing in the ear of the boy delivering probably the most indelible moment in cinema this year, because that’s best song elevated to the level of best filmmaking. But ‘Mystery of Love’ is crushingly gorgeous and always stood the best chance, and now the 2018 Oscars are exceedingly likely to include Sufjan Stevens singing about lost love while wearing some inexplicable #blessed outfit, and that itself is surely the greatest gift this show could give us. Save him actually winning and then making a speech.
THE BEST DIRECTOR CATEGORY IS REALLY GOOD. IT IS REALLY REALLY GOOD. It should have been seven though, and relatedly, Best Director is actually Sean Baker, for reals. Bria Vinaite had never acted before. Brooklynn Prince was six. The Florida Project should have been the missing tenth best picture nod too, while we’re at it.
But Best Picture I’ll you decide, as long as you don’t pick one of the wrong ones. You have about a 50/50 chance.